I know by seeing the title those of you who are reading are thinking...hmm ... is she in love? She has found someone? Oh damn may be she did since she moved back home and you are expected to be married off if you move back. Haha! None of these are the case. I was just thinking does the perfect guy exist (the kinda perfect in an individual's view). To me my perfect guy holds many different qualities which are not very difficult if a person happen to have a kind and nice heart.
Let me remove the confusion. The one who will be mine should be extremely nice to me and my family. He doesn't necessarily have to take me out on a shopping spree every month or has to be super rich. He got to give me immense love and someone who is caring. He cares when i am sick and would sit around with me and watch TV. Someone who gives me the highest importance in his life after his parents.He has to pamper me but control me a little too. I have to depend on him in many cases and situations and he would know exactly what to do to handle me. He should know how to handle me in my worst. Someone who doesn't leave me alone when i am angry or upset but gives me advices and makes me feel better. He would take me out once in a while to get me out of boredom( doesn't have to be an exotic vacation). Someone who value me and appreciates what i do for him. He should be understanding and know how to make me laugh. Someone who would cook for me once in a while. He would bring me flowers and candies and surprise me. I guess that is all i need and its that simple. If you can provide me with love and care i don't need much.
Now, comes to the character. I don't really care about his past but he should not let any negativeness in the past get in to our present. He should be striving to be a pious Muslim and struggle to leave out the bad and bring out the good in him always. Someone who follows the Sunnah of our Prophet Muhammad (SAW). He would remind me to pray in-case i forget. Someone who can have Islamic discussion with me for hours and not get bored. He should help me out in the household chores once in a while like our Prophet SAW had helped His wife. He should read the Qur'an and pray five times a day. We would wake up for fajr and pray together. Someone who earns money in a halaal way even if its little. Someone who keeps away from drinking, gambling, bad company. Someone who is all mine and i can put all my trust in to and depend on. He should try to be religious and have patience with me. Someone who can outlook my negativity and appreciate the positives. He should take care of these little things and always put effort in our relationship to be better.
I can go on and on about my demands on a perfect man. But have you ever given it a thought that you get what you deserve? I believe in that completely. So, i can't find someone like that unless i give my all in to improving myself to be as good as i want my life partner to be. This brings me to the Quranic verse : Allah Almighty says (interpretation of the meaning): “Bad statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for bad statements (or bad men for bad women). Good statements are for good people (or good women for good men) and good people for good statements (or good men for good women) such are innocent of that which people say: For them is pardon and a bountiful provision”
So if A’yesha may Allah be pleased with her is a bad woman then the prophet, peace be upon him is also bad.
In conclusion, I will not find a good hear-ted person until i am good myself. I will get what i deserve. If i am honest, loyal, patient, positive,loving and caring i will get these in return from my life partner. If i lie , talk ill, be fake, and not keep him happy then i cant expect my husband\soul mate to be all perfect to me. Makes sense? Its just not a theory of myself but it is coming from a Quranic Verse Allah says for believing men is for believing women. So , how can i ask Allah for a righteous life partner if i don't strive hard to become pious and righteous myself first? You cant just ask for duaa and expect Allah to answer it. Always strive hard to make yourself better first before you want the world to be all perfect to you and want everything to go right with you. And this verse is what keeps me going seeing all the negativity of the world that at the end of the day, nothing will go wrong with me if i always do the right thing and stay on the halaal path.
So the point of this blog is , do not loose hope. Good people exists and the change can happen but you should bring the change first by applying good in to your life and your character. Before raising finger at someone else ask yourself are you any better? Before being a hypocrite look within yourself. Before asking for a good man to Allah ask yourself are you good enough to deserve that. InshaAllah we all strive to be a better Muslim to gain the best of this life and the hereafter as well. InshaAllah Allah helps us find a righteous life partner and helps us to fight against all evil to live a righteous life.
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